Deb, I am writing and wanted to say this to you in my loving memory of you and in celebration of your heavenly birthday as you cannot be present in physical body. Your life was ended too short and before your time. The battle goes on: Estate of Deborah Ann Tate Trotta, Circuit Court in and for Martin County, Florida, Case No. 21001209CPAXMX.
As I have learned in many of my cases, the passing of time, and discovery, often confirm the ultimate truth. And I wanted to say to you that that is also true in your situation following your death (whatever the contributing causation in fact actually was or were).
I say this in hindsight (although basically I don’t believe in hindsight, and you also never would have asked anyway), but I do wish that I knew and that I sent to you whatever amount of money would have made you comfortable with simply leaving your situation and the relationship in which you lacked access to and control over your financial assets after 20+ years of marriage.
But the passing of time does often show the truth. A misleading and incomplete narrative was being driven, and I believe also gaslighting, prior to and after your body being found on September 12, 2021. By the way, I was also told (soon after your body was found) that you died on September 11 and that the Medical Examiner was incorrect with September 12, but then I was denied access to your phone and your supposed September 11, text, etc.
Depending on the facts of the case in some circumstances there truly are legitimate legal reasons for arguing about a decedent’s wishes (i.e., when there really is a dispute, and if assets, property and information are not being kept secret, and are being safeguarded). However, and I am sorry, Deb, that your situation and bad relationship were worse than I understood them to be as there is no legal or human justification for the now continuing control and possession over you (i.e., including over your ashes and personal property), or for denying your wishes which were stated and which are confirmed, and are obvious under the circumstances of your bad relationship.
There is simply no redeemable quality for someone who you were divorcing to possess and control you and your ashes and personal property including Tate ancestry and legacy items, and to not allow your ashes to be spread in California or for your personal property to go to the Tate family. You and I could start discussing personality traits and behaviors, but not here or today.
I wish that you had felt able to leave earlier in the relationship. I can only guess at how really, really bad your argument with husband was on September 11 (per the Sheriff’s Report and other testimony).
Deb, in loving memory I wish you a happy and peaceful heavenly birthday, and also provide my prayers for you and for all of the others who are with you. Love Dave
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Deb’s obituary and her beloved Annie:
Thanks for reading. Please pass this along to other people who would be interested.
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Best to you,
David Tate, Esq. (and inactive CPA)
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David Tate, Esq. (and inactive California CPA) – practicing only as an attorney in California.